How the customers deals with difficulties

Here, we try to find the things that make the solutions to work, or to fail,  in the context of the complaint

We try to find out the pattern of the solutions he tried, and failed, to get the planned outcome.  We do it by asking questions so we can follow his way of thinking.

What do you think and what do you do about this difficulty? How others are involved in the difficulties

Therapist: “Give an example that shows how you attempt to deal with the problem”
Applicant: “I’m yelling at the child”
“?Therapist: “What happens when you scream”

We have to be aware that people often express their feelings, about the difficulties, and do not describe their actions about dealing with them. Therefore, the questions should be more directed about what has been done about the difficulty:
“What do you do when …”, “What do you say when they do …”, “How are you trying to prevent?”, “What makes you do…?”, “What prevents you from doing…?”, Etc.
The received answers are varied: “Nothing”, I tried everything and it does not help “, ” I’ve been discouraged… I do not know what to do! ” In such cases there is a need  to go back and ask for details: ” Anyway, think and describe what you would normally do when difficulty arises …. ”
It is important, of course, get data not only on the client’s actions, but also on other persons, concerned.


The goal is to get a clear picture of the event. It’s like a slow screening of the film image that shows the entire chain of events with great detail. Meanwhile, the therapist should avoid asking questions pertaining to dissatisfaction